Saturday, October 3, 2009

Aged spinster

In 5 months I'm hitting a milestone, and I suspect I'm supposed to feel miserable and worried about being so close to 30. It has something to do with the fact that being 30 means you're squarely in adulthood, I guess. I don't feel adult most of the time, and I suspect that being 30 won't change that one little bit. I remember feeling rather down when I turned 20, for I had come to the conclusion that 20 meant the end of childhood, and I liked my childhood. Being 20 seemed old, I guess. I'm closing in on 30, and I'm far from being depressed about it. Shameful confession: I'm enjoying making my relatives feel old! You know; those relatives who were in their 20's when I was born... they're turning 50 now, and they don't really like it all that much. They also don't like me reminding them about it.
I must've gone through something during my 20's, for I don't see 30 as being old or as a yardstick for progress. I have freedom beyond anything I could've pictured ten years ago and responsibility enough to deal with said freedom. So far so good, at least, and it can only get better from here. I've got a threadbare plan for my future, which could change any time. Might as well try to live in the moment and keep plugging at it. Moving along.... I am a proud spinster! There, I said it. Ads for matchmakers and websites like e-harmony and the like nauseate me a little. They suggest that you should be with someone and not rely on your own mettle for ways to spend your time.
A quiz I took once suggested that I was a romantic realist, and not a real romantic. I'm willing to go even further and suggest that I am as far removed from romance as can be. I'm not interested in seeking my soulmate, partner, or anything like that. I'm not saying this is an improbable concept, for my soulmate might be out there looking for me, and if this is true, I'm making his job VERY difficult by not caring all that much. My priorities lie elsewhere, that's all. Speaking of priorities, I'm reading 'Welcome home' by the awesome Stuart McLean. Definitely a good read. Okay, that's about all. BYE.

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